Issue #43
Last Update December 24, 2005
New York City Around the Dear Ruin by Gert Innsry What is it with male poets? They seem to think that the way to get their girlfriend to hop into bed with them is to make her think of her withered old age. Personally, I can’t think of a bigger turn-off. I was reminded that this was not a new phenomenon at a concert of 17th Century song, put on by the Ensemble for Early Music. This group routinely provides a printed sheet with the lyrics. A Purcell song, Hark How the Wild Musicians Sing (referring to the birds of spring, not my musical friends) is a love song to Dorinda, who apparently is not falling all over herself to satisfy the lyricist’s lust. His clinching argument is in the next to last stanza:
Though now your eyes are all divine
their luster will in time decline,
if smiling youth goes off the stage
the scene will change to withered age,
when all your charms, Dorinda, will decay
and on a sudden vanish all away.
Gee, thanks, Henry. That image of my decayed charms certainly got me excited.
Things have not gotten better over the centuries. Endearing Young Charms, a favorite parlor ditty, continues the theme:
Believe me if all those endearing young charms
Which I gaze on so fondly today
Were to change by tomorrow and fleet in my arms
Like fairy gifts fading away
Thou wouldst still be adored as this moment thou art
Let thy loveliness fade as it will
And around the dear ruin each wish of my heart
Would entwine itself verdantly still.
Dear ruin? I’ll give you a dear ruin! What kind of a man would call his lady love a dear ruin, even prospectively? I’d smack him. This “Gather Ye Rosebuds” argument might have been a winner in Robert Herrick’s time (1591-1674) but it cuts no ice with me. Besides, when you’ve seen Katherine Hepburn, Sophia Loren, Jane Fonda and Shirley MacLaine age, you know it isn’t even true.
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